About Nude Not Naked

I know it is 23 days to the new-year but I can’t seem to get the idea out of my head. A summary seems perfect tonight as I sit in my bed, typing, deleting, typing again while watching Miami Ink. I guess there is no rule prohibiting one from summarizing the year 3 weeks earlier than usual.



*
I have not dreamt for two weeks. Now that is strange because I remember my dreams well. Not recalling my dreams is worrying. It all started two Sundays ago when I was about to drive to my parents’ for Sunday dinner.

There it was, on the Bachelor’s Jeep. There was a burnt paper, like those burnt sacrifices you would see at a Chinese funeral. I looked upwards into the blue sky. There was no trace of illegal burning. There was no funeral wakes in the vicinity. Strange, don’t you think?

I walked closer to inspect the burnt paper and it turned out to be a photo, burnt and seared at its edges. I felt a pinch of regret in my heart the moment I picked it up. I looked at the eyes staring back at me. The eyes were familiar. They were mine.

The burnt photo was sitting on the Bachelor’s Jeep and the photo was me. It was a passport photo of myself, in a work blouse I wore to the last photo session a year ago. And I do not know who burnt it. Or why.

Did the burnt photo steal my dreams away?



*
If I have to choose a word to describe this year, I think I would choose “tremendous”. 2007 is tremendous in every sense. It has been an exciting year, full of challenges and filled with excitement. I actually feel quite smug when I think about it. I have done a lot of things that I have never done.

Like working non-stop. This is the first year where I did not take much holidays. I usually work away from the office for at least three months of each year. However this year, I have my legs firmly planted in Malaysia. Specifically in my office, Monday to Sunday, from morning till night.

I started this year with a renewed vow. I promised to grow myself in every aspect of my life. I stopped taking my business for granted. I reclaimed all that was mine years ago. I worked hard and I shopped harder. The business grew and here I am 23 days into a new year, in a room full of things, which now includes a flatscreen tv (and a secret red Louis Vuitton in the cupboard - shhh).

A year ago I never imagined the flatscreen in my bedroom but yet, there it is, noisy every night. Looking at it now while I write this to you, I can’t seem to decide if I would flirt with Ami or Nunez (of Miami Ink).

I have not flirted in a long time. If flirting was a wall, it would be full of spider webs and icky flies.



*
I switch the television on the moment I retreat to my bedroom. I wake up at 3 a.m. and the tv flickers on and on. Occasionally the tv broadcasts red, green and blue lines with a flat high pitch beep. It is as if I am filling my emptiness with background noises.



This is about the only photo
I have taken 2nd half of 2007.

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